Be imitators of God

So the other day I had on Kate plus 8. I know, I know- judge away. But, since they took away HGTV from our cable package, I have to resort to TLC in my spare time. Anyway, this contractor comes in her house and sets his stuff on the island in her kitchen, and she proceeds to have a panic attack and explains how the kitchen is "her space" and he needs to quickly move his things to the other room. In another scene the hose is leaking and she almost has a meltdown on camera because it is another thing she has to add to her list of things to do. I have to admit I felt bad for her, but mainly I was scared- scared because I see a lot of myself in her, and it doesn't look pretty.

In my new position at Trinity I get to use the gift God gave me for event planning. I love details, schedules, and planning so this is a perfect fit for me. The problem comes in when I view the rest of my life like this. Buying a gift for someone? (we have 7 gifts we have to purchase this month...so this is an example that is fresh on my mind!) While I could see this "task" as an opportunity to love and serve the people I'm buying the gifts for, in my mind I think "how can I find a cheap gift as quick as possible so I can check it off my list?" Ugly isn't it? This makes everything about me: how am I going to get this done? How is this affecting my schedule and the other things I have to do today? And guess what? It's stressful. I'm moving from one thing to the next, constantly evaluating what I need to do, and I'm only satisfied when it's done. I get so lost in the little things that I don't bother asking "God, how do YOU want to use me today? Even in the little things?"

So why the title of this post "Be imitators of God?" Well, in the book I'm going through, "Seeing with new eyes," Powlison has us evaluating our desires and passions (mine being the above paragraph) which led me to Ephesians 5 which says "Be imitators of God." Imitating God means displaying the fruits of the Spirit- peace, patience, love, kindness, joy, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. Let's just say the fruit I am bearing when I am in my "go go go" mindset looks more like this: stressed, anxious, selfish, prideful, short tempered, and self dependent. Praise God that He transforms us and makes us new. He says "I understand that you can't do this on your own. I'm asking you to follow me in a radical way. That is why I have made you NEW, created after the likeness of me in true righteousness and holiness (Ephesians 4)."

Today I am praising Him that I am a new creation, and that He gives me the power to overcome my selfishness and sin. So this afternoon when I head to Barnes and Noble to purchase my gifts, I will choose to have a new attitude, and rely on Him in the process. Is it sad that I can't even shop on my own without relying on God? Maybe. But it is moments like this that I realize how desperately I need a savior.