This is a really hard post for me to write. Not only because it is hard to share what has happened that led us to switch countries, but also because it is difficult to articulate how I am excited about adopting a child from our new country, while simultaneously have struggled letting go of the hopes of adopting the child we have been praying for from Ethiopia.
I wrote a post a couple weeks ago asking for prayer because our adoption agency was closing down their partnership with Ethiopia. Things have slowed down so much and the referrals are so few that it was imminent. And really, while it was a shock to hear the news at first, looking back you can almost see the writing on the wall. When we first started the adoption process back in September of 2014, we were told we could potentially have a referral for a child that summer (2015). As time went on not only was our referral time pushed back to potentially years, the time between when you receive a referral and when you actually bring the child home was also pushed back to almost a full year. And this isn't anything that our agency was doing, it was unfortunately just changes in the country that have caused the process to slow down.
So we were given a couple choices- switch to another agency who is still working with Ethiopia and pay a fee, switch countries, or back out all together. Backing out wasn't an option for us, so we had to decide to either switch to a different agency who still had a partnership with Ethiopia or switch countries. And let me tell you, this was really hard. A huge part of me just wanted to go with the other agency who was partnering with Ethiopia and pay the fee. However after we really sought God through prayer and spent countless hours discussing with each other and the social workers at our agency all the options, He seemed to be pushing us toward the (only) other option for our family: China.
When we started the adoption process we didn't have a specific pull toward a country. We just felt called to adopt. period. Next, was deciding the country. From the start, we were very excited about adopting from Ethiopia, and thankfully it fit our family circumstances (some countries you need to stay in the country for 6 weeks when you go to pick up your child, and that just isn't an option for us,while others you needed to be a certain age to adopt, like 30, such as China). So for almost a year and a half we have been praying and envisioned our family with a child from Ethiopia. We have T shirts, pictures, cookie cutters, books, and Christmas ornaments that all pertain to Ethiopia. We were very excited about adopting a child from Ethiopia.
However, since we started the process in 2014, there are many things that have changed, and there are MANY factors that went into our decision to switch countries (money, time, age, etc. just to name a few) but the main reason we switched is because of the uncertainty with Ethiopia. Our sweet social worker walked us through all the reasons why our agency had to shut down their partnership, and one of the statistics she told us was really alarming. When we started the process there were 24 partnerships with Ethiopia, and now there are only 4 agencies remaining who have a partnership with Ethiopia. And honestly, it didn't surprise me to hear this either because as we called agencies in Illinois to update our home study and we told them we were adopting from Ethiopia, they were all very surprised to hear that we were still working with an agency that was partnering with Ethiopia because all of the ones that they knew of were closed or on hold for the moment. With so much uncertainty around what is going to happen with adoptions in Ethiopia, we decided to switch countries to China.
We are VERY excited to adopt from China. There are many many children in need of loving homes in China and we are excited to get our home study updated (we have to wait until Cole is 6 months before we can do that) and continue with the process of completing our Dossier. While the wait time is much shorter (potentially a year to a year and a half) we know from past experience that anything can happen. So we will have a much better idea of when we could potentially have a little guy or girl after our Dossier is complete and we are on the waiting list.
We want to say thank you so so much for your prayers as we had to make SUCH a difficult decision. It was not easy at all. A good friend encouraged me by saying that it was completely normal that I was struggling with balancing my feelings of excitement about adopting from China and sadness about not adopting from Ethiopia. In the end, Dan and I are passionate about following God's calling to be a light in this broken world and to redeem parts of this world that are hurting by welcoming a child into our home that doesn't have a family - and ultimately the country doesn't determine that. Whether the child that is matched with our family is born in China or Ethiopia or another country, we feel privileged to be called by God to fight for the fatherless.
And so this is just another part of our story. And we don't expect this to be the last surprise along the way. Everyone said to have open hands throughout the adoption process, and so that is our goal. And it's not always easy (as we are experiencing it first hand), but we are excited to see where God is continuing to lead us. Thank you again for all the support you have given us along the way!
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