Finding a balance with Mother's Day

I struggle a lot with writing Mother's Day posts. Over the years God has brought a lot of people into my life who have shared with me how this holiday can bring so much pain and heart ache. Whether they have lost a mom, have a strained relationship with their mom, or deeply desire to be a mom, there are so many emotions that can come with one day and my heart aches for every. single. situation.

And my biggest struggle is finding a balance. Because how do I celebrate the two beautiful mom's in my life and the blessing of the little boy that made me a mom almost 3 years ago when there are so many people who are hurting? Especially as we have shared about our season of infertility, I have met so many other sweet women who have tried for months and years with no baby of their own. And unfortunately this "holiday" is yet another reminder of that emptiness, and at times the thought that I could hurt another person prevents me from saying how thankful I am for being a mom myself.

Yet this is what we are called to do. Rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. Celebrate the blessings and mourn the losses at the same time. But how do we do this? If anything God has showed me that being a mom has absolutely nothing to do with me. The rejoicing is not about pointing to what an amazing person I am because I am a mom. The rejoicing is about pointing back to Him. He is the creator and author of life. I did nothing to deserve the privilege of being called a mom. He is the one who gives me ANY sort of love, patience, and wisdom to be a mom. Mother's Day isn't about how great we women are who are moms. Mother's Day is a reminder of God's unconditional grace. The grace He showed us when he undeservedly entrusted us with our little boy. The grace He showed us when He called us to adopt a child. The grace He shows me every single day when I give my best efforts to be selfless, loving, and kind, only to be reminded it's not about pointing Jake to how great I am, but pointing Jake to how great our God is.

And so this Mother's Day I praise God for the two wonderful mother's that are in my life. One who selflessly gave up basically her life for 18 years to raise 3 kids under the age of 1. And the other who raised my amazing husband to be the respectful, patient, and loving man he is today. And I praise God for the gift of Jake. Because it's days like Mother's Day that God reminds me what a privilege it is to parent him even though there are difficult days.

And this Mother's Day I mourned for my friends who have lost their sweet moms. And my heart ached for my dear friends who deeply desire to be a mom, yet patiently wait on God and His timing. For the moms who have suffered miscarriage after miscarriage yet strive to see God's goodness through the hurt. I wish Mother's Day was easier, but it's not. And such is life. With every celebration there can be a reminder of what was or what could have been. That is why our hope can't be in a holiday but in God who never ceases to show us His kindness, who never stops loving and pursuing us, and who promises to bring us unconditional joy.

I was so thankful to spend the weekend with my extended family :)