Plan C: The Unexpected

So remember when I wrote about Plan A and Plan B?  Well, here comes Plan C.  We're pregnant.  Yes, after almost two years of trying, seeking God as He led us to pursue adoption, He shocked us with a positive pregnancy test.  Even now it's hard for me to find words to express our emotions.  I've told some friends that while I am thrilled that God not only is blessing us with an adopted child (yes we are still adopting :)  More on that below) but another child through birth, my heart still breaks for my sweet friends who have reached out to me sharing their stories of how they have been trying to start a family for years now with no such ending as ours.  And while I know that times like these deserve a celebration because if any of my friends who had been trying for a while shared such news with me I would be thrilled, I know that sometimes another pregnancy post can be hard to hear when you are in the waiting.

As I have been reading through my journals over the past two years, I can truly say looking back that I wouldn't change anything- and I pray that as an encouragement to some of you.  God has taught me so so much and I trust Him more having experienced the waiting that we did.  I can honestly say that although I am SO grateful for this growing baby inside of me, I am even more grateful for the new joy and hope that I have in Him that I wouldn't have had before our season of waiting.  So to those of you who are struggling through a season of infertility, please know I am still praying for you.  Not only that God gives you a little baby- whether it be by birth or through adoption, but also that God deepens your faith in Him- that you lean into Him even when you don't understand His timing, and that God will show you that hoping in Him and His timing is better than anything you had planned:  "I am still confident I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.  Wait for the Lord, be strong, and take heart, and wait on the Lord."  Psalm 27:13-14

Adoption updates:

Yes, we are definitely, 100% still planning on adopting.  We are very excited to adopt and feel strongly that God called us to start the adoption process when we did, even though we are pregnant now!  This new baby is obviously no surprise to Him.  And one of the many reasons we chose the agency that we did is because they don't stop the process when you are pregnant, because we knew that could always be a possibility.  The biggest waiting we are doing right now is to update our home study.  Since we moved, that needs to be updated, and after that we can finish our Dossier (which we were almost done with before we moved) and hopefully get on the waiting list as soon as possible!  Lifeline does have a policy that our youngest child needs to be at least 6 months for us to accept a referral- and because the wait times have increased in Ethiopia, the likelihood of us even receiving a referral before this baby is 6 months is very unlikely. So for our situation, the timing of this baby won't affect our wait times at all.  However, we are continuing to pray for Ethiopia and the increased wait times because there are so many families who are ready to accept a child and have been for months and years now!  If you could join us in praying for Ethiopia we would SO greatly appreciate it :)

So, as we enter a season of pregnancy, adoption, and a new job, I can't hep but read this verse and hold it ever so tightly:

"When God brings you into a land with large, flourishing cities you did not build, houses filled with all kinds of good things you did provide, wells you did not dig, and vineyards and olive groves you did not plant- then when you eat and you are satisfied, be careful that you do not forget the Lord, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery." Deuteronomy 6:10-12

This is where God has us.  After a difficult season He has brought us to a place of abundance.  We know that this too is a season, but I know how easy it can be for me in the "high" seasons of life to easily forget all that God has done for me and where He has taken us.  So our prayer is that we would honor Him and give Him glory during this time in our lives.  I love Mary's song of praise which I find being mine these days: "He who is mighty has done great things for me!" Luke 1:49  

We have arrived... in our temporary home.

There's a lot of things about transition that can be hard. Saying goodbye is never easy.  Packing and cleaning can be downright exhausting.  Trying to help a toddler adjust to the idea of a temporary home can be confusing.  And there is an endless list of doctors to call, internet to change, insurance to update, etc.  Thankfully, we are moving to a place where there are plenty of familiar faces.  There have been groceries dropped off at our home, old restaurants we have been excited to try, and friends to catch up with.  And for all of those things, we are so so grateful.

The hardest challenge thus far has been waiting.  Until our home sells in New York we are kind of at a stand still as to how to move forward with our lives here.  The type A list person in me wants to move into a home here asap.  Especially since we need to update our home study for our adoption, we can't do that until we have an actual home to update!  And, it can be hard when you see homes that you like quickly slip off the market.

But as always, God has shown me that waiting is going to be apart of my life.  Whether it's waiting for a baby, waiting for an adoption, waiting for a new job, waiting for a home.  Waiting is always the same.  It involves trusting that God has already gone before me and is making a way.  That he sees our future home.  He sees our future neighbors.  He sees the future family that is going to live in our home in NY.  And the challenge for me is always sitting in that unwritten story and finding comfort in this space that I'm in.  And not just being ok in the waiting, but trusting that God even has a plan for us while we're in this temporary housing.  That He may want to use us and grow us in ways that He couldn't if we were in our future home.

And so we wait.  In the next couple months we will settle into this temporary place and see what God has in store for us here.  And I will need to fight back the "what if's" and my typical controlling tendencies.

So we will get back into the new normal here soon.  I'm excited to dive back into my daily photos (I know lame, but for real, I am lol), we will find the parks and libraries and find a new normal.  And I'm excited to keep you updated as I do :)

Here are some pictures from our last couple weeks in New York :)

We're packing our bags again.

Yes, once again the Cinadr's are on the move!  Does it feel like we just got to New York, because at times it can definitely feel like that on our end!  However, we were very excited when a couple weeks ago Dan received and accepted a job offer from Valspar, and in the next week we are going to be heading back to our old stomping grounds: the suburbs of Chicago :)

As with every move we have done, there are so many emotions.  While we are so thankful for this opportunity that has been presented to Dan and looking forward to connecting again with the wonderful friends we had in Chicago, we definitely are going to miss the community we have formed here in New York.  We have had so many great people come around us and support us here over the last two years and the way that God provided friends almost instantly when we moved to New York was such a blessing.  We have grown in so many ways and it definitely is going to be hard saying goodbye to our friends, church community, co workers, and neighbors. 

So this week we will head out with a heavy heart saying goodbye to some great friends, but with anticipation to what God has in store for us in the future as we head back to Chicago :)  

Here's some of our favorite memories from New York!

Starting our adoption

The many trips to pick apples

The Spiedie Festival

Visiting some New York parks 

Trips along the East Coast: Boston

Oh the Binghamton Carousels

The Story Garden

Trips to Cooperstown

Our porch

Trips to the East Coast: DC 

Wegmans Halloween

 Trips to Ithaca

The Fall

The great friends we made

That time we made the Binghamton newspaper

Indoor Water Parks

Raspberry picking

Sugar Lips (aka ice cream places)

Where Jake first started mowing the lawn :)

More trips to Ithaca

Some of the great friends we met at church!

How little Jake was when we moved in!

Our trip to the PGA tour in Rochester

Trip to the Finger Lake wineries

 And more apple picking :)

 More Wegman Halloween

More trips along the East Coast: New Hampshire

Jake's first haircut (this was the before lol)

Our first trip to NYC where we met famous people :)

Surviving the New York Winters (mainly Dan surviving his long commute to Walton :)

The Nesting Place: A Book Review

I can't tell you how many times the following words have flowed quickly out of my mouth when a guest arrives at our home for the first time: "Please ignore the paint color in this room, we hope to get around to painting it soon.  And I'm sorry for the rip in our couch, we are currently saving up to get a new one." 

If anyone new comes to our home, I am the first person to point out everything negative about our home.  It's like I need to give an explanation for why something looks the way it is before someone looks at it and they judge me.  It's twisted and weird, but I constantly do it.   

That's why I love Myquillyn Smith's book, "The Nesting Place," because she doesn't just give tips on how to decorate your home, she invites you to evaluate how you view your home in general.  She also provided some VERY convicting words of wisdom like this one:

"Stop apologizing for your home, it makes guests feel uncomfortable, it encourages discontentment, and your husband could be hurt if he feels you apologizing for what he's provided."

Yeah, I'd say I needed to hear those words.  Instead, Smith encourages imperfections in our home, saying "imperfections play an important role, they put people at ease and people feel they can be real... when a home is perfect, I start thinking of myself and wonder if I can move a pillow or I worry about how to act."

And she then proceeds to break down the purpose of the home, asking how you want people to feel when they visit your home.  Do you want it to be a place to connect?  Then prioritize good conversation and plenty of comfortable seating.  Do you want it to be a place of inspiration?  Then pay attention to what inspires me and start collecting inspiring mementos.  By her asking these simple questions it led me to think what is the priority in my home?  After writing down some notes I decided that an important one is having plenty of space for Jake and his friends to place.  So, we did something as simple as switching the direction of our carpet and our coffee table so Jake had more carpet space to play on the floor (and let's be honest, so I could sit down with him, too!)  because we have all wooden floors in our home.

She also gives some great practical tips:

• Move the furniture around- easy and cheap way to change the look of your home
• Make your home useful for the life stage you are at
• Home is less about stuff and more about people
• Take risks
• Quiet the room: remove all but rugs, furniture, and drapes.  This lets you see the room and what it really needs- new drapes, new paint, etc.  Then, try to find a signature piece for that room.
• Start in the room you spend most time in then determine the purpose for that room
• Don't buy sets, buy unique pieces that you can change

I could write SO much about this book, but these are the big things that really stood out to me from her book, as well as all the beautiful pictures!  I love her perspective on the home and would highly recommend to anyone picking up this book- plus I hear you can get it on kindle for $2.99 right now which is a steal :)